Tuesday, October 07, 2008

RAK's and ups and downs

I've been RAK'ed! I went to the post office on Saturday and found a package from my lovely friend Donna (if you want some good bath goodies, go check out her site, Creative Body Essentials - best foot scrub EVER, and everything else I've ever tried has been wonderful, too!). She knew I'd been feeling down lately and struggling with my faith, and she sent me three beautiful things: a suncatcher with the verse "We walk by faith, not by sight", a beautiful music box with the same verse that plays "How Great Thou Art", and a key ring/prayer box that had a slip of paper tucked inside with Jeremiah 29:11 written on it. I was so touched, I was crying and laughing all at the same time. Thank you, Donna - you were truly a blessing from God to me!

And today, I really need to be reminded that we walk by faith. I got a call from the principal's office just before lunchtime. Julian was in the office, having disrupted class all morning, and the straw that broke the camel's back was that he cut his hair. He said I'd said he needed a trim, and I did - but I didn't tell him to do it himself. I've e-mailed his teacher to find out what the other disruptions were, and I talked to the principal for a bit. She said Julian had to wait, because she had someone else in her office when his teacher brought him down, and when the other person left, Julian said, "It's my turn!" She told him no, it was his turn when she said it was, and he needed to wait until he was called. As a result of this, Julian had to miss specials with his class (which he loves - that's when they have art or music or computers or P.E.), he'll have to eat lunch in the principal's office, and he'll have to miss recess and sit in the office. The principal said that today they'll call it a time out in the office, but if it happens again, it will be considered in-school suspension. I told her that we were aware of his difficulties, that I'd been talking to his teacher and the counselor and was aware of his ADHD tendencies, and that we had an appointment with his pediatrician next Monday to start the evaluation process and do what needs to be done to help Julian get a grip on his behavior. I also told her that he and I have talked about how his brain is probably wired differently than other kids' and how that may make it hard for him to focus, but that he also knows we expect him to mind his teacher and behave in class and at home, that it's not some kind of blanket permission for him to cut loose and act out any way he pleases. She said she could have his teacher do a Conner's survey to help out with that, and I told her she'd already done that, that we had a copy and would be taking it to the appointment on Monday. I felt like she was thinking he must just be undisciplined at home and that I must be a slacker parent for having a child who'd act like that, and it sucked. I'm trying not to cry and really trying not to let this wreck my day. It's just something else to deal with, right? We'll talk to his doc and go from there and get a handle on things, right? This doesn't mean my child will become "that kid", the one whose name teachers cringe to see on their class rolls, does it? I never went to the office for anything, ever. I was one of those disgustingly good kids. I can't wrap my brain around this.


Carrie said...

"This doesn't mean my child will become "that kid", the one whose name teachers cringe to see on their class rolls, does it?"

Lisa, OMG, I probably posted this in my old blog word for word. That is EXACTLY how I felt before we were finally able to figure out what worked best for my E. Just remember, it isn't an easy path (as we had to go through three meds until we found one). But you know, new school year, and his teachers (who know he has ADHD) find it remarkable how controlled he is in class now and how respectful he is of his teachers and classmates. (Our problem is after the meds wear off in the evening, but at least he is great through the school day!)

Lisa said...

Carrie, thank you. {{{HUGS}}} Knowing y'all have made it so far is such a help to me, and I really appreciate all of your encouragement. I'm already anticipating a rough ride until we figure out what works, but just knowing that it *can* get better does help.