Tuesday, March 13, 2007

More automotive fun

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.

My car wouldn't start again this morning. I tried to rev the engine to get it to catch, as it was running really rough, but it died. I waited a few minutes, and it started. With J in tow, I got the car to the dealership in Waxahachie. They'll check it out and let me know. The guy thinks the starting problems and the strange noise I'm hearing are related. He also said he'd had one with a similar noise problem and it turned out to be a coolant leak. He mentioned the heater core, and I said I'd had mine replaced in December - if Kwik Kar effed something up doing that, I'm going to scream. And if it involves the heater core or that general area, I already know what that involves - taking the whole damn dashboard off and a shitload of labor costs. It cost me over $800 to get that bad boy replaced. Then I went to Hertz to rent a car. I had to get cash out of the bank to rent a car, because my debit card wouldn't go through. When, when, when does it get BETTER?!?!?!

And I'm now driving a nice little Kia Spectra, and thoroughly depressed - it's such a nice, clean, quiet little car, no funny rattles or bumps or things that need fixing, and I know a new car is not even close to being in my budget. :sigh: So I'll keep driving my rattly, bumpy, messy, paid-for heap.

And then there's K. As I've said before, he has helped me out above and beyond child support, and I do appreciate that. I have told him that when I find a better job and my financial situation is more stable, I'll pay him back that amount as I can. Today I called to let him know I'd made it in with the car and gotten the rental car, and I also mentioned that Katy said my loan will go through, and we may be able to close as early as tomorrow. K asked how much cash I was getting, and I told him I was going to ask for a bit more than I'd originally planned, to cover these car repairs. He started asking me if I could pay back part of what I owed him. I said I could pay some, and he started asking for an amount. I was worried about my car, I'd just had my debit card turned down and taken most of my cash out of savings to rent a car to get to my effin' job that I hate, and he wanted to know how much I could pay him from what's supposed to be my emergency fund. GAAAAAAAAAAAH. You know, I appreciate the fact that he helped me out way more than he had to, often to the point that he put himself in a bind. He didn't have to do that, and I am going to pay him back. But this morning was not the best time to push me on it, when I don't even know how much it will cost to fix my car and I'm taking on a huge house note just to get enough cash out to say I have a savings account, and I wish he could have seen that. Of course, I got wiggy and then he got pissed, saying never mind, it doesn't matter. It does matter, I'm going to pay him back because I don't want this hanging over my head. His timing was just severely off. And honestly, I wish I'd never been in the position of having to ask him for help. I feel like I tried my best to carry us financially while we were married and while he had a job that he liked and that liked him but that unfortunately ran out of work periodically, often for long periods of time, and wouldn't even consider a second job to help out. We ran up a shitload of debt just trying to get by, and I filed bankruptcy to get out from under mine (my debt was a good bit more than his, as I had good credit before I got married and credit card companies were happy to give me enough rope to let me hang myself). I've wrecked my credit to try to clean up the mess that was created while we were married, I did not make that mess by myself, and it chaps me that he's now jumping up and down for me to pay him back when he knows my finances aren't good and after me feeling like I carried a substantial portion of the financial load while we were married. He paid off his debt and didn't destroy his credit. I know I owe him the money, and I'm going to pay it back, but it feels like just another creditor dunning me for money, and I so don't need that right this minute. Now is just not a good time for him to be asking me about paying him back, and it hit me the wrong, wrong, wrong way.

On the bright side, I got a voice mail about the transcription work. :) So I'll call back and see if I can get some good news there. Hopefully the second half of the day won't suck as much as the first half has.

4 comments:

Christy said...

Hang in there, Lisa.

Liza's Eyeview said...

ohhhh... I know how hard car troubles can be....

I have been reading but have not had much time to comment...

hang in there sweetie...

"Lord, send your Holy Spirit to help Lisa today, in Jesus name, Amen".

Nicki said...

I really hope things get better for you soon, you deserve it!

Lisa said...

Thanks, y'all! {{{HUGS}}}

Liza, that sounds much like what I pray every morning. And sometimes every afternoon, evening and night, too.