Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Back to square one

Brian had applied for a job up here, and he was hoping to get it - one, because he's gone about as far as he can at his current job, and two, because that would mean we'd have been 30 minutes apart instead of 90 minutes. He found out yesterday that he didn't get it. And it's not the end of the world - not like he's now going to be any farther away than he is right now, at least not at the moment. But he said in an e-mail that he wrote that he likes where things are with us right now and was hoping to get the job up here to see where things went from there. And I'm disappointed, too. Thinking about it, I really do like him quite a lot. He's still looking for another job, and unless he were to change fields altogether (not out of the realm of possibility, but I know it would bother him not to use the degree that he invested so much time and effort and money in), it's possible that other jobs might be even farther away from here than where he is now. Not much point really worrying about it unless and until a job offer in the Panhandle or some other far-off part of Texas comes up, but thinking about the possibility makes me really, really sad. I don't know where things might end up eventually with us, and I certainly wasn't setting out to look for anything that could have the potential to turn into something long-term. But yeah, I think the possibility is there, and I know I'd be crushed if he did move somewhere far away and we didn't ever really have a chance to see what direction things might go.

Hell, I'm not sure I'm even making sense. Suffice it to say, if he did end up finding a job farther away, I'd cry. A whole stinkin' lot.

On that happy note, I'm going to go sedate myself with chocolate, go to bed, and wait for Friday to get here. I've got that to look forward to, anyway.

No comments: