Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Feeling better

I'm somewhat recovered from my earlier wallow in the pity pit. Funny how a chocolate chip cookie can make almost anything seem a little better! :-)

And whatever I said earlier, I don't mean to bag on K. He is a good friend, and he is a good dad to J. And if he's got some difficulty coping with things sometimes, maybe part of that is due to his personality, and maybe part of it is due to the fact that I was such a huge control freak during most of our marriage (although I wasn't even really aware I was doing it, I did tend to take over most everything because I wanted it done my way). I think we've done a fair job of keeping things amicable, and I think we can continue to do that - after all that's been said and done, I can't imagine what could come up that would suddenly make us want to spit and hiss at each other on sight. I just need to learn to stand up for myself when it comes to having that little bit of time for myself, and he needs to learn that there's not much absolutely right or wrong in how J is raised, and that he can cope with things even if he isn't sure he can (or, that he's more capable than he thinks - I guess self-confidence would be the right term).

I'm just having the hardest time focusing at work! I feel like I do with J, having to constantly remind myself to stay on task. But it's just a pure effort, and it's making me tired.

And I still have to figure out what the hell to do about Cingular. I guess I'll suck up and call and see if they can work out some payment arrangement with me - I can't come up with $500 right now for the life of me. If not, what will they do? Sue? And attach what under a judgment? No liquid assets to speak of, no court would make me give up my only personal vehicle (and thus my means of getting to work), the house is mortgaged (and there again, I don't think any court would make me sell my home for a $500 unsecured debt). As far as I can tell, I'm pretty much judgment-proof. I just hate having to deal with nasty debt collection people. I thought that was over after I filed bankruptcy, dammit.

On the bright side: the wife of one of my co-workers wants to buy some of my bears that I'm wanting to part with! So far I'll be making about $100 on the ones she wants so far. If I sell some on eBay, I may make even more - I've realized going through my collection that I have a lot of nice pieces, collectors' pieces, limited editions.

And I'm going to get my brakes looked at and probably redone on Friday morning. It's my late night, so I don't have to be here until 10:00. I'm going to do my best to get up early, wrangle J to school early, and be at Sears when the automotive department opens at 8:00. I just hope they've got a Starbucks somewhere close by. But I'll feel better when the brakes are fixed - they aren't squealing or scraping yet, they just feel not quite as stable as they used to. Next to work on: new shocks and a new battery. And lots of prayers that nothing else major goes wrong!

Only 40 more minutes - I think I can, I think I can....


JamDaddy said...

Glad you have somewhat recovered. Does J have a small job or two around the house he can help with? We always gave the kids a few things to "help the house run" and make them feel part of our successes. The first thing they would do when they noticed one of us feeling down was their small job, making sure we noticed how well they did it. It was always hard to be down with a kid smiling and showing off how they were working so hard to make us feel better.
If the $500 was before the Bankruptcy I would make your Lawyer do some leg work and get them off your back. If they did not file complete paperwork that is their fault. Companies are famous for moving debt from one collection agency to another. The collection agencies get paid a commision and don't share records. Therefore the one that worked your bankruptcy is probably not the one calling you now. Make the Lawyer earn what you paid him. Unless he tells you to call them DON'T. Have him do the leg work and if needed and required by law get a payment plan. Only then make payments. He should be able to stop the calls.
Good Luck on your Ebay sales. I love Ebay my only problem is I end up buying more than I sell. My wife dreads the boxes that arrive all the time.

The Anti-Wife said...

Sweetie, they won't come after you. Even if you don't pay, they will just write it off and put a big X on your credit. $500 is nothing to them. The collection people are pitbulls...they are trained to intimidate you. You have legal rights to stop their calls. You have to ask them to stop calling and request that they contact you in writing only. If they don't stop, they can get in all kinds of trouble.

Lisa said...

I'm late reading all my comments! LOL

J does have things to help with around the house - some he does well, some he does not so well. LOL He's a work in progress, and I still have to do a lot of reminding, but he's a good kid. I keep telling myself that all the reminding will pay off someday.

The $500 was something they're saying accrued after I'd filed. I understood it to be that my contract was terminated when my bankruptcy was filed, so I'm not sure how that happened, unless the balance I was given as what I owed didn't include all the charges that had accrued (as in, some charges hadn't been billed yet and therefore didn't show up in my balance).

And I decided to go ahead and just pay the damned thing. That way I'm done with it.