Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Curiously light

Well. Considering I'm about half a breath away from financial disaster, I feel curiously light. My bank account is overdrawn, I don't get paid until next Tuesday, I can't withdraw money from my 401(k) because there isn't enough in there, and there's not a damn thing I can do about it. I can keep looking fast and furious for a better job, I can find as many things to sell around here as possible, I can cut expenses wherever possible, and the rest of it is out of my control. I can't make payday come any faster, I can't wish myself a raise, I can't make a job open up for me any sooner. It's out of my hands, and I feel almost a sense of relief, if that makes any sense. Yeah, being broke sucks ass. But I have to trust now that it will all work out for the best, because worrying about something I can't control is a complete waste of my time.

Today has been a delight. I was already planning to stay home to get my dryer fixed (which, fortunately, was free - hooray for the extended protection plan!), which turned out to be a good thing, as my A/C went on the fritz last night. Niiiiice. And my DSL wouldn't connect last night, either - I thought, well, I paid the bill, it can't be that. Wrong. Called this morning, the bill hadn't been paid in spite of me scheduling a payment online for August 1, so I paid that. A/C guy came out this morning, nice. $190 bill, not so nice. But I can't function without A/C in August in Texas, so I was glad they could come this morning and not, oh, sometime around next Thursday. And voila, things paid and - overdrawn account!

That does suck, though, to be at the point where I'm having a hard time paying for things I *need* (like A/C repair). It's kind of getting past the point of cutting out frivolous expenses, so something has to give soon. Hopefully it won't be my sanity!

I've got to get some sleep. Since DSL was down last night, I was in bed by 11:00 and had a good night's sleep (even with J waking up at 3:45 convinced it was time to get up and watch monster trucks - um, no). I should do that more often.

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