Sunday, September 17, 2006

A dreary Sunday

I'm in a funk. Have been for most of the weekend. I'm not really sure why, although I think it's a combination of several things. I'm feeling down about the Waco job, feeling less than positive about my chances. I have no concrete reason to feel this way, I just do. That bums me out first, because I'm desperate to get out of where I am now and the Waco job sounds like a very Lisa kind of job, and second, because it makes me wonder if Brian and I are never meant to end up in the same place. And if that's the case, well, there wouldn't seem to be the possibility of much future if you always live far apart. I know he and I aren't considering anything serious right now, but I do like him. And it would be nice to at least have a real chance to see where things end up. I didn't look to find jobs in Waco, didn't expect to ever find anything in Waco, which is why it seemed like such a providential surprise when I did. But if it doesn't work out, it will make me wonder if that's a big sign that Brian and I just aren't meant to be. And the thought of that possibility makes me very sad indeed.

I'm also really down about having to go back to work tomorrow. I think there's enough said right there.

I'm making a batch of Chocolate Stuff and I've got a stew cooking in the crockpot. Maybe cooking and chocolate will improve my mood a little.

At least it's raining today. Lord knows we need it.

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